Cute Flower Dress

Dear Avery at Two Months

Dear Avery,

These first few months have gone pleasantly well. They say it takes a village and I am lucky to have many helping hands. The first three weeks home with you your father worked his tail off to ensure that you and I could rest and enjoy newborn bonding and feeding. Strangely enough the time felt like a break from the hustle and bustle of being pregnant and trying to manage the day in the life of a two year old boy. Being able to lie in bed staring at your beautiful head as you slurped away felt like a much needed vacation. And, the break from cooking and cleaning was delightful. I couldn't believe that I could actually take the advice of doctor's and forget everything but you. But, I did. With the help of your father and grandparents.

After your father returned to work we spent two weeks in Walnut Creek with your grandparents during an East Bay heat wave. During this time your grandparents were hopping up and down to keep up with Zealand so that I could care for you. You still were fairly fussy and needed to be held a lot. I kept wondering how in the world am I going to do this all by myself?

Well, you, my dear, supplied the answer. The minute all of my helpers left you turned a corner and decided that you didn't need to be held all of the time after all. Grandparents and even your father left Tahoe where we vacationed right before we officially settled back into our life in San Francisco. Michelle and her two girls met us in Tahoe for two days without husbands and just kids. We hustled and made sure mouths were fed and little bottoms were washed while enjoying the scenery. It was the first time I was alone with the two of you.

We did it! You miraculously became a sleeping angel with brief moments of content wakefulness throughout the day. Since that time, starting about 6 weeks weeks, you have shed your fussy skin (except for a brief period right before you settle in at night) and crawled into a more content, aware, and just pure happy place.

You are very generous with your smiles - handing them out like pennies at the check out stand. You stare directly into our eyes smiling and cooing, doing everything you can to connect, legs kicking. These moments are so priceless. Brief moments throughout busy days to communicate and concentrate on one another. You are one social little newborn. You love eye contact and your big blue eyes lock onto things with rapt attention.

Throughout your second month you have been a champ during outings set up for your big brother. You sleep contentedly in my baby carrier and only fuss when your stomach tells you to. At this point your days our spent with your big brother, your mama, and play dates arranged for Zealand. Your mama has discovered the secret to stay at home motherhood with two kids - every day meet up with mama friends and their kids so not only is Zealand happy to see friends but others can watch the older kids briefly while I nurse you. Like I said, it takes a village.

Zealand is slowly warming up to you or to the idea of sharing you with us. Whenever you sneeze, poop, or fart Zealand says with delight "whaaat waaas that noise?!" "Oh, baby." He likes to rock your swing, lie down with you on the baby mat, and last night he helped me to give you a bath - pouring water from a cup onto your tummy. The other day at a friend's house you were being held by someone else and he seemed to be concerned that I was going to leave you in the arms of someone else. He said with genuine concern, "baby coming with us?" It shows that for all of the difficulty he is having with the reduction of attention he is receiving you are slowly worming your way into his heart.

And, so it is with all of us, you are expanding our hearts in all kinds of new directions. And, bigger, to be sure.

We love you baby Avery.

Love,

Mama

Tahoe for the 4th

Dear Avery at One Month

Dear Avery,

You arrived in this world very competent at the one thing you needed to know how to do - breastfeed. You latched on right away and have not wavered from the task at hand. In the hospital between feedings you would lay sprawled across my chest warm and tiny. All of the nurses commented on how comfortable you appeared. You still prefer this position and now just about any warm body will do. You love to be held. In fact, you will cry your now famous cry until someone takes pity and scoops you up. None of us really mind though. There is nothing more cozy than lying down on a couch with a newborn heavy on your chest. You spent your first month in the arms of either your mother, father, grandmother, or grandfather. And, over the fourth of July holiday you spent lots of time in the arms of your grandmother Mary and Auntie Annika.

There has been a lot of commentary on the sound of your cry. Your grandfather thinks you sound like a hawk at times. It is indeed loud and shrill. I hate to admit it but I at times I enjoy to hear your cry. It is so dramatic it is almost comedic. You sound as though you have been humiliated and injured at every last fiber of your being. The funny thing is you go from a zen silence to a shuddery wail and back again to a place of deep calm all within a few minutes. It is as if you are consciously turning on the waterworks and sound for effect and then off again once we have brought you to our chest.

There is definitely a Southern Belle side to your personality. You will sit quietly in your bouncy seat with your long fingers draped across your pink blanket looking at us as if we are a bunch of uncivilized hooligans. I suspect your little frame houses a fairly old soul, a feminine one at that.

I do not want to paint too pretty of a picture here. Although you are most definitely a dainty little thing, you also let it all hang out when passing gas or a poop. Almost after every meal you bear down with all your might groaning until your diaper shudders with the force. Your upper lip often curls up slightly as you concentrate on this momental passing. I love the contrast with your delicate demeanor.

Welcome to our family little girl. You have already brought a new, welcome energy into our family. I think of lightness and brightness. You are asking us to stop and slow down and to see everything before us. Even your little brother is having to soften his breakneck approach to life. You are part of us and you complete us.

Love,

Mama

Z the Climber (Video)